Why go to meetings? Because they work! End of discussion! But for those of you who like to argue...read ahead.
If you have been to a substance abuse treatment facility you know that it is stressed from day one to attend meetings and that it plays a big role in your recovery. Then why is it so hard to accept how important AA or NA meetings are to your sobriety? The main reason has to do with our ego. Most likely while you are in treatment your basic needs are being taken care of, for the most part. You are feeling apart of a small, close knit group who accepts you just the way you are. Your thought processes are becoming more clear and you are finally starting to feel good about yourself. For many addicts this translates into, "I'm fine now. I'm feeling great. I can do this on my own." But hold on there! Most likely, while you are in treatment, you are simply learning how to deal with life without any chemical substances that alter your thinking. Any problems that arise are settled in your small groups with this close knit group of friends that you are relying on now. It's those unpredictable "life" experiences that come after treament, that are just apart of life, that can and will throw you off. Your treatment group is no longer a support system for you. Your family may or may not be a support system but unless they are actually in the program their support is different than what you will get from going to 12 step meetings. This is where your meetings will help you. Old timers in the program have a lot of life experience. Their lives, just like yours, have been full of ups and downs. The difference is that they know how to handle these problems without using. They have learned how to do life on life's terms. It's a way of life for them now that creates peace for them. They would love nothing better than to share it with others. That is what keeps them sober. They reach out and help others, just like you will do if you stay the course. Think about it... when you find out something that is really cool that once baffled you, don't you love sharing it with others?
What are you doing at meetings? Are you sitting in the back not wanting to participate? Are you scared to talk at the meetings? Are you scared you won't be apart of the group? Everyone has felt this way at some point. This is what helps: Go to the meetings and help set up. I compare this to going to a potluck. If you go to a potluck and bring a dish to share with others, you always feel a little more comfortable and like you are really a part of the party because you contributed in some small way. The same is true with helping out at meetings. A small thing like setting up the chairs, putting out the literature or greeting people gives you a sense of belonging. Stay after the meetings and simply just talk to people. Volunteer to chair the meeting, if they allow newcombers to do so. Tell people you need a sponsor, several people will most likely stay afterwards to help you out. Ask another friend to go with you. If you find an open meeting of AA or NA, anyone can go with you to that meeting. It always helps to try something new with a friend. Ask someone in tretment to go with you or meet them there.
I remember back in the day making up excuses as to why I couldn't attend AA meetings. My excuses ranged from me not having anything in common with those people to not having time. Neither was true.
Sobriety is full of challenges. Some we bring on ourselves, others are just thrown at us without warning. Wouldn't it be nice to face those challenges with someone who has gone before you and knows how to solve it? So, here's my challenge to you. Try something outside of your comfort zone for two weeks that will challenge you to try new healthy behaviors. If it is hard for you to get to meeting, make yourself accountable to someone else who will hold you to your word. If you are scared to attend, ask a friend to go with you. If you do not have friends yet, sit next to the first person at a meeting that smiles at you. The point is, try something different so that you are actually trying out various meetings in your area. If you keep doing what you are doing, you'll keep getting what you're getting. You can do it!
Just saying....
